WHEN I BECOME THEIR FANS (PART II)

Credit: YG Entertainment

(Part I)

I never know that simple action and curiosity could lead me to something really precious in my life: meet WINNER and become an INNERCIRCLE. 

Being a fan of WINNER is definitely different when I'm being fans of BIGBANG. It's much much much more special because i know them since day 0 while i get to know BIGBANG when they already a big and popular group. What makes it more special for me is i too also grow up with them.

In 2013, i was in my last semester of college and in the middle of preparation for my thesis. At that time i was super lonely, almost all of my close friends already graduated and busy with their first job so not only feel lonely, i also feel so insecure. I kinda lost and really not knowing what i should do after i graduated. Looking at how hard they work to achieve their dreams in WIN is really helps and supports me in so many aspects. I kinda understand their struggle at that time because i feel it too, i also anxious about my future, what's gonna happen to me after i graduate? Could i get a decent job? Could i achieve my dream job? That is the reason why i really root them, i also want to them succeed and achieve their dreams. I even download Kakao Talks so i could vote for them, i also download it on my friend's phone and even my mom's phone, nagging them to vote Team A.

I remember my eyes got swollen the next day because of nonstop crying. A bittersweet time. I still can't re-watch any WIN episodes, it's really hard to see them suffering. (Photo credits to @maybmustbjackie on twitter)

So, when they finally win and became WINNER, i plead to myself that i'm gonna support all their activities. I'm gonna buy all their album, attend their concerts and everything just to support them. 

In 2014, i got my first job and later WINNER finally debuted with their 2014 S/S. It's my first album that i bought with my salary, my own money so it really feels special for me. I'm super proud with WINNER because they're the fastest idol (boy group & girl group) to win their first win only in 10 days after debut, achieved all kill for their title song 'Empty', all their songs entered top 10 charts and called as monster rookies because of their achievements. My babies did that! I'm a proud sister! 

but things not always good for them, not long after they debut, YG mismanagement them by not give them proper exposure and they got a long hiatus until 2015. I really hate YG because of that and still hate YG till today. 

You know it's really funny that our journey is kinda aligned because 2015 is also not the best year for me. I'm not in good condition, mostly my mental health. My work just drained me and got me super stressed. There's not a day that I'm not crying, i lose my weight (I really love to eat and workout but because of genetic i'm not the type that gained or loss weight easily. In my best condition, my normal/ideal weight is 47 kg but at that time my weight was 41-42 kg, you couldn't imagine how unhealthy i was that time), i lose my appetite, i always felt restless and the worst part was when i got bad vertigo. 2015 is really not a good year for me. It's getting better tho after i resigned and my new office's environment is much much much better than before. I'm slowly gained my weight back and my mental health condition also gets better. I become much happier in 2016 and that was the time WINNER released EXIT album. 

2016 is the best year for me but not for WINNER and also me as innercircle because of all the difficulties they had that time. I even still cry every time i remember it and if it's even hard for me as a fan, how hard it must for them? So let's only talk about the good things of 2016. The good things is we get to know how much they love us, Innercircle. It's not that we don't know that before, but 2016 just proves how much they really care about us. Seunghoon always comes up with so many contents, creates SeungSeung TV (WINWIN TV) with Seungyoon and all members always tried to communicate with IC via V-live, Winnercity and their personal instagram. I'm so grateful to them and Team Winner because of that.

The chaos 'WINWIN TV' Episode 1

2017 - WINNER and INNERCIRCLE best year, the beginning of the new era, the year the legendary song 'Really Really' released, Fate number For Album. The year when '4', the number that everybody said is bad luck, become our lucky number. It's really the BEST ERA because they're doing SO many activities, the public loves them, 'really really' got really popular, they also become king of univ festivals!

"THERE IS ALWAYS SUNSHINE IN MY HEART"
The legend photo, my forever favorite wot4 photo, forever engraved in my heart. Their airport fancam, the time when they went to LA to shoot Really-Really MV. *CRYIIIIING* 

Also, WINNER OVER FLOWERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The big budget fake car CF just to kidnap them (Ottokee, they're really working hard for the fake CF) also the jeans incident kkkkkk and when they wear friendship bracelets, huhu they're so cute!!!! Also when they go whale watching and met a baby whale and said the baby whale who keeps practicing to jump is like them when they were a trainee. Never give up and keep practicing even tho it's hard and they keep failing. Jinu even said that at that time their goals it to debut, but things got even harder for them after they debut T.T I want to hug him.

"Whales is the only animal that constantly moving. It's resembled our lives too" - Seung Yoon
*CRY CRY CRY*

Ah, I feel so grateful that they get so loved by public and also Na PD team really adore them, even Shin PD becomes Innercircle. Yang Hyun Sucks, who? I only know Na Yeong Seok! I really want to turn back the time to 2017, i want to feel the excitement again!!

HAIL, NA PD! THE BEST SEOKS! 

2018!!!! Everywhere World Tour!!!

The year when I finally got to see them, oh my god!!!!!!!!!!! I don't realize that my tears keep falling down while i was singing along with them T.T It's just like a dream that i could finally see them, singing in front of me! After 5 years, i finally got to see them!!! In late 2018, they also released Millions for us, to keep the '2 albums in a year' promised. My best boys! 

In 2019, they released WE and CROSS album and  i got to meet them again in Cross Asia Tour. I told you that i keep crying at the Everywhere concert, right? I cried even more at the Cross concert. I know that I'm a crybaby but Winner just doubled or maybe tripled my crybaby feature.  I can't stop crying, i want to keep seeing my 4 babies singing together.  *crying for the 4444444th time*

and now, 2020, the worst year *crying again* not only because it's the year when Jinu and Hoon must enlist but also because of the ongoing pandemic in the world. COVID-19. *shivering*

But as always my bests boys always give their best for Innercircle because they're doing an offline concert FOR FREE on 14 Feb for 2+ HOURS!!!!! (I remember that i watched it omw back home and crying on the bus) to replaced some concerts and the encore concerts that got canceled because of the COVID-19. THE BEST BOYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Their 'Remember' Album, their last album before they come back as wot4 again after the military service. The best gift for Innercircle. The masterpiece, the best album, the no-skip album, the album where they pouring all their heart to ICs.

Same as what WINNER always said about the meaning of WINNER itself to them, for me WINNER also part of my youth, my 20s too were also always with them.

I want to say thank you and love you. Thank you for being Winner and being one of my support systems. We never know what will happen in the span of 2 or 5 years but one thing that i know for sure I'll always be here waiting until all of you finished your duty. I mean we already go through the hardest time in 2013-2016 together and can overcome it, so this time will be a little bit easier, right? So, don't worry because we'll always be here. Just please always be happy and stay healthy.